Anyone who really knows me knows that I play things close to the vest. This is especially true of anything to do with my health because things can change very quickly for the worse. Historically that has been the case for me. This time last year I had just gotten out of the hospital after an asthma exacerbation.
This year I was in due to both COVID and an asthma exacerbation and I was scared shitless. After 2 1/2+ years of being extra vigilant, being fully vaccinated and boosted, wearing N95 masks everywhere, including two trips to L.A. for work, I was exposed on a work trip to Miami. I was in the hospital within 3 days of testing positive. I left my quarantine bubble to go to the hospital, not knowing if I would ever come back. It was the most sobering and terrifying experience I’ve ever had, and that’s saying a lot.
I was in hospital for four days, released back home still COVID positive to quarantine, and continue treatment. All with the Damocles Sword hanging over my head that I may develop COVID pneumonia, and to come back if I did. Statistically, based on my medical history, I shouldn’t have survived. But I did.
I’m dealing with Long-haul COVID and residual asthma issues, but I’m here. Oh, and something no one tells you about COVID until you talk to others who’ve had severe symptoms…the hallucinations… Yea, let that one sink in for a minute. As always, I’m grateful for the team at Methodist West for taking great care of me.
This selfie below was taken the day before I tested positive for COVID, but two days after I experienced anaphylactic shock at a team dinner. Nothing like being escorted out of a 5 star restaurant by EMS and security, in front of 100 of your coworkers to make you super popular at work the next morning.
As an herbalist and voice actor, my health, and specifically my vocal health, is so very, very important to me. My journey in herbalism began with my Rheumatoid Arthritis at the age of 17, I’m 38 now. I was looking for ways to incorporate herbal/natural remedies in conjunction with Western medicine to help alleviate my symptoms and slow the progression. As a voice actor, I had a traumatic and nearly fatal asthma attack and vocal cord paralysis in the summer of 2016 that required me to be put on a ventilator and having a tracheotomy. I ended up with complications that resulted in a tracheal resection, a pneumothorax (collapsed lung) and subcutaneous emphysema. I say all that to say that I couldn’t talk for nearly two months, I had to learn to care for a trach, etc.
Once I had been discharged and the trach was removed, I had to focus on falling back in love with my voice (my vocal range had changed) and how to best care for my voice and vocal health. Here are my tips for keeping your vocal health front and present:
Sleep– Caring for your pipes starts with whole body care. Getting enough sleep affects so many body functions; from cognition, immune system response, digestion, mental health, etc. Getting a consistent sleep routine is vital.
Foreplay – Now everyone knows you can’t just jump in the booth without any prep work and expect your voice to give you its best. In order to coax the best performance out of your voice you have to give it loving attention. Warm that thing up – vo warmups, lip trills, tongue twisters, scales, proper inflection, etc.
They are back in stock! Vocal straws train the posturing of the vocal folds and changes the posture of the vocal tube, i.e. it lengthens the Epi Laryngeal Space.
AHMAZING vocal coach who has an entire program to help you find your range along with practice materials and videos, etc.
Rodney Saulsberry* – has a great book “Tongue Twisters and Vocal Warm Ups” sold on Amazon.
3. Regular Maintenance– This includes voice rest, listening to your body (when it’s fatigued, stressed, etc. -see #1), maintaining a healthy diet (avoiding caffeine, chocolate, sugar, dairy and smoking -both cigarettes and weed at least 2 hours prior to a session).
Frankly putting anything into your lungs other than oxygen before a session isn’t the best of ideas. If you are a fan of, procurer or indulger of THC, please don’t smoke before your sessions. It will affect/change the texture of your voice. If you use THC for relaxation purposes I encourage you to eat it (edibles rather than smoking it). CBD can provide some of the same relaxation and anti-anxiety properties without the psychogenic properties that THC has.
Proper hydration (not just before a session/auditions) is key as well. By the time you realize that you are thirsty you are already dehydrated. Keeping your air passages moisturized by using a bedside humidifier with distilled water at night. I wouldn’t necessarily advocate their use in the booth due to noise interference.
Keep a scarf 🧣 on when out in windy/cold weather. This helps to keep warmth in and cold out. Cold temps cause constriction on muscles and tissues and decreased blood flow to those affected areas.
4. Leave it alone when it doesn’t want to be bothered
There is nothing worse than someone wanting something from you and you are in no mood to oblige. But you acquiesce to shut them up. Is it your best performance? Nope. Is the other party satisfied or generally let down b/c of a lackluster encounter? Exactly. If your voice is fatigued or stressed and you push it b/c it’s a high paying, high visibility audition you will not give your best. Not only might you not book the job, you may leave a bad impression with casting directors, agents, etc.
Stress, anxiety, illness, irritation- all these show up in your reads. It’s the equivalent of the elephant in the room sitting on the couch loudly eating your best snacks, drinking your fav scotch and who stole the remote and is watching Seinfeld reruns.
5. Protect your mental mind -give yourself grace and be patient with yourself. Frustration comes across in your reads.
Be present in the moment and take a step back if you need to regroup during a session. Trust, the director and client will respect that you have a process and need to gather yourself in order to give them your best.
Practice mindfulness 🧘🏽♀️- make your recording space a healthy and welcoming place, regardless of where you record. I have lavender/rosemary sachets hanging in my closet-booth, led light strips to set the tone and mood, and I meditate and do deep breathing before every session. Whether it is with my coach(es), a workout, audition recording, recording session or training webinar.
Lavender is known for its relaxing properties and rosemary counteracts anxiety and increases attention. I grow and dry my own lavender, add dried lavender flower and rosemary from my favorite herbal suppliers (The Bulk Herb Store, Mountain Rose Herbs & Monterey Spice Company) and a few drops of lavender and rosemary essential oils to a drawstring bag and hang it in an inconspicuous place.
I hope that these tips help you and cause you to dig a little deeper into your own herbalism journey and vocal health!
I’ve had multiple instances in the past couple of weeks where someone (in this case WASP / White Anglo Saxon Protestant female manager bolstered by another authoritative WASP woman) automatically assumed I was lying and tried to “catch” me by offering up what they saw as “proof”. I had to write detailed explanations of the circumstances, justify myself and provided my own absolutely irrefutable proof that I was indeed being ethical and truthful from the very beginning. (I.e. I shut this mess down quickly with perfect tact, professionalism and screen grabs.) This was followed by the most insulting five words I’ve heard in recent memory, “Thank you for your honesty.”
Thank you for your honesty?! That insinuates that you assume that everything I say and/or do is fabricated until you feel you have sufficient proof that I’m telling the truth. This coming from the same non-POC people who, when the tables are turned, and I KNOW that non-POC has glaringly lied through their perfectly veneered teeth, tell me to “assume positive intent” or that I “misunderstood” what they said/did/asked/instructed/demanded. I am positive that it was intended to make me out a thief of time, a fabricator of salacious falsehoods and unethical to boot. Nothing there to misunderstand.
To compound all of this and add insult to injury, the earlier exchange is later followed by a backhanded compliment of a recorded WebEx presentation I did 3-4 weeks ago saying, “… it was very professional and easy to follow. I was very impressed with your presentation skills…”. There again are the micro aggressions.
It is automatically ASSumed that we are lying. It is automatically ASSumed that, despite our experience and education, we don’t have the same or better skill set than our white counterparts. And when we prove we ARE telling the truth and we DO have the knowledge and expertise, they are “impressed” with our professionalism and presentation skills. You ASSume because of my milk chocolate hued skin, my Afrocentric name and my love of head wraps that I couldn’t possibly be poised and polished and able to lead, teach, and inform the masses, let alone the white masses. I have to prove to you beyond what is expected of my white counterparts that I AM and that I CAN.
This is what it is to be black in Corporate America. This is what it is to be black in America, period.
Things have been hectic since Hurricane Harvey wrecked havoc in August and the entire region has been trying to recover and resume some sense of normalcy. While my ability to ship out orders was delayed things got done, orders were shipped and received and all went well. But it was during this time that I’ve been MIA on my blog that I was putting that time to good use. Read the rest of this entry »
We are pleased to announce T. Nicole Designs, in association with The Artisan Group, will participate in an invitation-only luxury celebrity gift lounge hosted by GBK Productions on September 16-17, 2016 at an exclusive location in Beverly Hills, California in honor television’s best and brightest stars.
Our Fidelis Bracelet Collection, Nautical Dreams Bracelets, Granite Haze, Black Rose and Dragon’s Blood bracelets will be prominently featured on display at The Artisan Group’s exhibit, and all attending celebrities, select press and media, and other VIPs will receive our Fidelis Lion Head bracelet in either Black Onyx or Garnet in their swag bags. This event will also be attended by around forty press and media outlets.
Tanesha N. Graham, T. Nicole Designs’ sole proprietor, is a resident of Houston, TX.
ABOUT THE ARTISAN GROUP
The Artisan Group® (http://www.theartisangroup.org) is a premier entertainment marketing group dedicated to representing small business artisans at the best celebrity gift lounges and press events. The organization provides a collective sampling of handcrafted products to celebrities and members of the press at top luxury gift lounges such as those leading up to The Academy Awards, The Golden Globes, The MTV Movie Awards and The Primetime Emmys.
The Artisan Group also coordinates product placement of its member’s handcrafted products on such hit television shows as Scandal, The Voice, The Vampire Diaries, Days of Our Lives, The Young & The Restless, Modern Family, Jane The Virgin and Law & Order: SVU, among others. Membership in The Artisan Group is juried and by invitation only.
* Neither T. Nicole Designs nor The Artisan Group are officially affiliated with The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (The Emmys or The Primetime Emmys).
2015 brought major changes for me as I worked to discover my voice as a designer and create my brand. I put out the first two collections of my designing career, Eclipse & Safari, which was a very scary experience. It wasn’t frightening in the sense that I was worried about them being commercially successful or not; though profitability is always a part of it. I was more so concerned about staying true to my vision for each line and not bowing to the pressure of trendiness; I concerned about designing and crafting a product that was unique and unlike anything else; I was concerned about making high quality pieces that when I stepped back would give me contentment and personal fulfillment, as each and every piece I make has a little bit of my heart and soul in it.
I found that my fears were valid but misplaced. I think every designer, every entrepreneur, that has a passion for their art, faces these same pressures. There’s the frustration of submitting your work, your unique vision to the masses and getting some really positive feedback but that feedback doesn’t equate to sales. Then there’s the times when there’s no feedback at all, neither positive nor negative and you’re left staring at Instagram waiting for the likes to come in, wondering what you’ve done wrong. You begin to question whether or not you’re putting out a good product and if you should chuck it all in the waste bin and focus on your day job. You’re bleary-eyed, depressed and despondent only wanting to be liked on social media and seriously thinking about acquiescing to social media influences, jump on the trend train and make the same mass produced pieces as the big box stores. (No shade implied or intended)
This was me for part of 2015. I had some commercial success. I had my designs featured in a local small boutique in Houston, I had a few discussions with some stylist out of New York but I didn’t see the type of success I really wanted. I got depressed for a few months, I stopped designing, I stopped even wearing my own work. I was in a place of pity and self-loathing. But lucky for me that I have an AWESOME support system of family and incredibly close friends who are prayer warriors and realist who brought me out of my funk with real talk and encouraging words.
I realized I hadn’t failed as a designer, I hadn’t failed as a business owner, I hadn’t failed at anything simply because I made the effort and put myself out there. I had put my heart and soul into my work and put it out for the world to judge; I remembered 2 Timothy 1:7, “God did not give us spirit of timidity but one of power, of love and of self-discipline”. Once I remembered who I was and to whom I belonged, new opportunities came my way. My pieces can now be found not only on my website, T. Nicole Designs but also on BeLuxLife!
So while 2015 was a year of trial and error, learning and faltering, it was a year that I’m grateful for. I learned quite a bit about solidifying my vision and finding my voice as a designer. I learned to be patient with myself, as the kind of success I’m looking for doesn’t come overnight. It is earned through prayer, faithfulness, diligence and fortitude.
It’s perfectly ok to go against the grain because being different is what sets me apart. So I’ll continue to push forward, creating jewelry and accessories that are inspired and unique. Because while everyone else is singing the harmony I’ll be the one belting out a melody all my own. Here’s to a brand new year filled with unforgettable experiences and opportunities for personal and professional growth.
Hey my lovelies!! It is one day closer to Friday and I am elated!! I have quite a few male friends, most of which I have known for 10+ years, and they all have the same qualms with and/or about women. They are confounded and irritated by some of our behaviors and ask me time and time again why we do certain things. So in an effort to demystify the female gender I’ll let you all in a few things.
Issues that stupefy men:
1) Why do women carry an extra pair of shoes (flip flops, slides, etc.) with them and only put on their “real” shoes when we get where we’re going?
Have you all seen our shoes!? No matter how hard designers try women’s high heels (stiletto, wedge or otherwise) are not built for comfort and function, they are built to be beautiful and sexy. After a while (this varies from person to person) our feet are burning and hurting but we still want to look good, so we endure it. Therefore we normally will refuse to put on the instruments of our beauty and torment until we absolutely have to. Just as an FYI a woman is INCREDIBLY comfortable with you if she allows you to see her all dolled up but in her flips… I dare to say she may even like you! 😉
2) Why do women put on their makeup in the car rather than at home?
Ummm… now this one is a bit tricky. Personally I will don’t wear a whole lot of makeup, power, eyeliner, lips and maybe blush/bronzer but that’s it. I don’t put on concealer, foundation, eyelashes, etc. on a daily, it just isn’t my thing. I’m not knocking anyone who does; I just don’t want that kind of maintenance every day. Nonetheless, I don’t necessarily have a concrete answer for this question. From time to time if I am running short on time and need to get on the road, then yes, I will do my makeup in the car. That leads to number three…
3) Why do women ALWAYS leave late?
Enough said!
4) Why do women say “Fine” but bring stuff up later?
This has been posted all over Facebook, Pintrest, etc. but lends more than a kernel of truth. While not all women prescribe to this, it isn’t far off base.
You’ve been warned…
5) She said she didn’t want anything for Valentine’s Day/her birthday… I didn’t get her anything (or I got her a card) and she’s pissed! But she said she didn’t want anything…
OK babies, let me help you out here and let you in on something. Most women (not all) want you to guess or pay attention to the hints that she drops about gifts. I don’t personally do this, I think it’s immature and childish and it is playing games with people. But a women will drop hints about what she wants and then eagerly wait for you to have put these in your mental Rolodex and pop up with the one thing she wants the most.
Leaving a magazine open in plain view to a certain piece of jewelry or accessory and in a place that is completely out of the ordinary. Like your car… your side of the bed… the bathroom tub
Saying, “I love that *insert any noun here*… *sigh* “
“Heather/Tiffany/Jaime/Juanita/Sheila just got *insert any noun here* from Bob/John/Chris/Aaron. She’s so lucky! (while pouting or casting sideways glances at you)
Asking, “What do you think of this? Isn’t this nice?” All while showing you something that is of no earthly interest to you and while you are engrossed in a video game or sports. You normally just grunt and say, “Yea, uh huh” just to get her to get it out of your face.
While this is not an exhaustive list of quandaries, they are the ones that I hear from my guy friends the most. Maybe this will help some poor man who is having trouble navigating the waters of a relationship and will demystify female behavior.
We have reached the middle of yet another work week and I am elated because the weekend, and hopefully some late Saturday morning sleep, awaits me! My pain levels and lack of sleep due to the RA and related back issues has been off the charts here for the last month or so and shows no signs of abating. Nonetheless I am pushing through as usual and have created a team for the 2014 Walk to Cure Arthritis in Houston, TX on May 3rd!
We’ve all heard about arthritis, but most of us don’t know that there are 100 forms of arthritis, that more than 50 million Americans have it, or that 300,000 children live with arthritis pain every day. It’s the leading cause of disability in the U.S., and sometimes it’s even deadly. According to The Arthritis Foundation approximately 1.5 million people in the United States have rheumatoid arthritis (RA)! Read the rest of this entry »
Happy Friday my lovelies!! It is Friday and despite some of the negativity that has gone on this week I refuse to let it get me down. I am headed home to play with my three dogs and I found this in an email from a former co-worker and it made me laugh. I don’t know who to attribute this to but I had to share it. I’m not a fan of cats, I am dog lover myself (Tyson, Lennox and Lola) below but this is hilarious!!
Lenny & TyTy
Tyson & Lola
Find something to make you smile today and every day.
WHAT PETS WRITE IN THEIR DIARIES
Excerpts from a Dog’s Diary…..
8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm – Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm – Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat’s Daily Diary…
Day 983 of my captivity…
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They
dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or
some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless
must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to
disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I
had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending
comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am. Idiots.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed
in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could
hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due
to the power of ‘allergies.’ I must learn what this means and how to use it
to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this
again tomorrow — but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The
dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be
more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the
guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors
have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is
safe. For now…
With a new year comes fresh perspective and gratitude for all those things we have been privileged enough to have and experience. Some of you may know that I have a passion for making jewelry and for community outreach and activism. With that T. Nicole Designs is proud to present “Gems and Dresses”, a philanthropic endeavor to provide dresses and coordinating handmade accessories for school formals and proms for those young ladies in the Houston Metro Area who would otherwise wouldn’t be able attend.
I’m hoping to be blessing to many young women in the Houston Metro Area and am asking your help in going through your closet archives for any dresses, cocktail, after-five, formal, etc. that you would be willing to donate to this cause. Any donation would be greatly appreciated!
If you know of a young lady, in the Houston Metro Area, who I could be a blessing to please send us an email at gemsanddresses@designsbytnicole.com.
T. Nicole's Graham Cracker Crumbs 
Don’t Put Your Labels On Me – Part II
Here we are yet again… *sigh*
I’ve had multiple instances in the past couple of weeks where someone (in this case WASP / White Anglo Saxon Protestant female manager bolstered by another authoritative WASP woman) automatically assumed I was lying and tried to “catch” me by offering up what they saw as “proof”. I had to write detailed explanations of the circumstances, justify myself and provided my own absolutely irrefutable proof that I was indeed being ethical and truthful from the very beginning. (I.e. I shut this mess down quickly with perfect tact, professionalism and screen grabs.) This was followed by the most insulting five words I’ve heard in recent memory, “Thank you for your honesty.”
Thank you for your honesty?! That insinuates that you assume that everything I say and/or do is fabricated until you feel you have sufficient proof that I’m telling the truth. This coming from the same non-POC people who, when the tables are turned, and I KNOW that non-POC has glaringly lied through their perfectly veneered teeth, tell me to “assume positive intent” or that I “misunderstood” what they said/did/asked/instructed/demanded. I am positive that it was intended to make me out a thief of time, a fabricator of salacious falsehoods and unethical to boot. Nothing there to misunderstand.
To compound all of this and add insult to injury, the earlier exchange is later followed by a backhanded compliment of a recorded WebEx presentation I did 3-4 weeks ago saying, “… it was very professional and easy to follow. I was very impressed with your presentation skills…”. There again are the micro aggressions.
It is automatically ASSumed that we are lying. It is automatically ASSumed that, despite our experience and education, we don’t have the same or better skill set than our white counterparts. And when we prove we ARE telling the truth and we DO have the knowledge and expertise, they are “impressed” with our professionalism and presentation skills. You ASSume because of my milk chocolate hued skin, my Afrocentric name and my love of head wraps that I couldn’t possibly be poised and polished and able to lead, teach, and inform the masses, let alone the white masses. I have to prove to you beyond what is expected of my white counterparts that I AM and that I CAN.
This is what it is to be black in Corporate America. This is what it is to be black in America, period.
#staywoke #resist #DiaryOfAMadBlackProfessionalWoman
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Posted by grahamcrackercrumbs09 on October 21, 2017 in Social Commentary, Work Life
Tags: Corporate America, Culture, Diary of a Mad Black Professional Woman, Life, Micro Aggressions, Opinion, Race, racism, Reflections, Resist, Social, Social Commentary, Stay Woke, Tanesha Graham, Work, work life, Working While Black