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Don’t Put Your Labels On Me – Part II

Don’t Put Your Labels On Me – Part II

Here we are yet again… *sigh*

I’ve had multiple instances in the past couple of weeks where someone (in this case WASP / White Anglo Saxon Protestant female manager bolstered by another authoritative WASP woman) automatically assumed I was lying and tried to “catch” me by offering up what they saw as “proof”. I had to write detailed explanations of the circumstances, justify myself and provided my own absolutely irrefutable proof that I was indeed being ethical and truthful from the very beginning. (I.e. I shut this mess down quickly with perfect tact, professionalism and screen grabs.) This was followed by the most insulting five words I’ve heard in recent memory, “Thank you for your honesty.”

Thank you for your honesty?! That insinuates that you assume that everything I say and/or do is fabricated until you feel you have sufficient proof that I’m telling the truth. This coming from the same non-POC people who, when the tables are turned, and I KNOW that non-POC has glaringly lied through their perfectly veneered teeth, tell me to “assume positive intent” or that I “misunderstood” what they said/did/asked/instructed/demanded. I am positive that it was intended to make me out a thief of time, a fabricator of salacious falsehoods and unethical to boot. Nothing there to misunderstand.

To compound all of this and add insult to injury, the earlier exchange is later followed by a backhanded compliment of a recorded WebEx presentation I did 3-4 weeks ago saying, “… it was very professional and easy to follow. I was very impressed with your presentation skills…”. There again are the micro aggressions.

It is automatically ASSumed that we are lying. It is automatically ASSumed that, despite our experience and education, we don’t have the same or better skill set than our white counterparts. And when we prove we ARE telling the truth and we DO have the knowledge and expertise, they are “impressed” with our professionalism and presentation skills. You ASSume because of my milk chocolate hued skin, my Afrocentric name and my love of head wraps that I couldn’t possibly be poised and polished and able to lead, teach, and inform the masses, let alone the white masses. I have to prove to you beyond what is expected of my white counterparts that I AM and that I CAN.

This is what it is to be black in Corporate America. This is what it is to be black in America, period.

#staywoke #resist #DiaryOfAMadBlackProfessionalWoman

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T. Nicole Designs to Participate in Luxury Celebrity Gift Lounge in Honor of the Television’s Best and Brightest Stars

T. Nicole Designs to Participate in Luxury Celebrity Gift Lounge in Honor of the Television’s Best and Brightest Stars

We are pleased to announce T. Nicole Designs, in association with The Artisan Group, will participate in an invitation-only luxury celebrity gift lounge hosted by GBK Productions on September 16-17, 2016 at an exclusive location in Beverly Hills, California in honor television’s best and brightest stars.

Our Fidelis Bracelet Collection, Nautical Dreams Bracelets, Granite Haze, Black Rose and Dragon’s Blood bracelets will be prominently featured on display at The Artisan Group’s exhibit, and all attending celebrities, select press and media, and other VIPs will receive our Fidelis Lion Head bracelet in either Black Onyx or Garnet in their swag bags. This event will also be attended by around forty press and media outlets.

Fidleis

To learn more about T. Nicole Designs and our products, or our participation in this exclusive event, visit www.designsbytnicole.com ], call 832-529-2696 or email tnicole@designsbytnicole.com.

Tanesha N. Graham, T. Nicole Designs’ sole proprietor, is a resident of Houston, TX.

ABOUT THE ARTISAN GROUP

The Artisan Group® (http://www.theartisangroup.org) is a premier entertainment marketing group dedicated to representing small business artisans at the best celebrity gift lounges and press events. The organization provides a collective sampling of handcrafted products to celebrities and members of the press at top luxury gift lounges such as those leading up to The Academy Awards, The Golden Globes, The MTV Movie Awards and The Primetime Emmys.

The Artisan Group also coordinates product placement of its member’s handcrafted products on such hit television shows as Scandal, The Voice, The Vampire Diaries, Days of Our Lives, The Young & The Restless, Modern Family, Jane The Virgin and Law & Order: SVU, among others. Membership in The Artisan Group is juried and by invitation only.

For press inquiries regarding The Artisan Group, please visit http://www.theartisangroup.org or email press@theartisangroup.org.

* Neither T. Nicole Designs nor The Artisan Group are officially affiliated with The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (The Emmys or The Primetime Emmys).

 

 
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Posted by on September 2, 2016 in Uncategorized, Work Life

 

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Easter PSA

We are at the halfway mark of Holy Week and there is something that has stuck in my craw for years.  It’s time for another PSA/ “Grinds My Gears”segment.

*Drags soapbox to the middle of the room, steps up and taps mic*

Excuse me, excuse me.  May I have your attention please?

As you all gear up for Easter/Resurrection Sunday and are buying all these pastel colored dresses, Steve Harvey suits, hats, and finery, it grinds my gears when some of you people randomly do stuff  and accept things just because they are in popular culture.  Here’s a biology lesson just case you all didn’t know, rabbits/hares/bunnies DON’T lay eggs.  Never in the history of the world has a rabbit or rabbit-related organism laid a multicolored, painted, glitterfied chicken egg.  Not the Cadbury Bunny, not Bugs Bunny, no daggone bunny lays eggs!

When The Lord rose from the grave and the stone was rolled away there was not a bunny sitting at the threshold with the angel waiting to announce His resurrection.  There wasn’t a rabbit there pooping out colored hard-boiled eggs and jelly beans on top of pink plastic grass.

Just as a bit of history for you, chicken eggs were dyed red by early Christians in Mesopotamia to symbolize the blood of Jesus shed on Calvary. The shell represents the tomb of Christ and the breaking of the shell a symbolic representation of his breaking the chains of death.  The Easter egg custom was adopted by the Catholic Church in 1610 A.D. by Pope Paul V.  We as Christians can see the egg as a symbol of resurrection as the egg contains new life within it. How this morphed into adults hiding cooked eggs that were dyed the night before while watching the Ten Commandments is beyond me.  Hiding eggs in the grass, trees, bushes, under cars, etc. has to be one of the stupidest things I have seen.  Kids are fighting and pushing each other out of the way to get an egg that you know they won’t even eat, it will decay in a plastic basket next to pink and blue marshmallow Peeps that will NEVER decay.  You know that at least one of those eggs won’t be found and less than a week later as it rots in the sun, just out of sight, you will be complaining about a sulfur smell and dumbfounded as to where it is coming from.  I have no issue with Easter eggs as long as you understand and explain to kids the symbolism behind it.

To do something, anything for that matter, just because it has always been done (tradition), just because, and/or without the right context is off putting and asinine.

Your ignorance is showing, tuck it back in, nobody wants or needs to see that.

And that my lovelies is what grinds my gears!

*drops mic, climbs down off soapbox, places a purple dyed egg covered in glitter on the ground and exits stage right*

Even the bunny is confused...

Even the bunny is confused…

easter-bunny-2

Food for Thought

T. Nicole

 

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Where’s the Remote?!

Happy Hump Day my lovelies!!

There is something that has been irking me for a long, long time and dagnabbit it is time for another “Grinds My Gears” segment.  I’m sure some people will blast me and voice their ire over me posting this but whatever! LOL

It grinds my gears to see all of these feminine hygiene commercials.  Don’t get me wrong, I am a very much a woman and I know and understand that issues are had.  I know that there is a market for tampons, pads, odor spray, feminine wash, etc.  But damn it enough is enough!  Some of these are just too much!  Some random confounded actress saying that she didn’t know that sex and soap could throw off her pH balance (why her mother never told her these things is beyond me) and  Summer’s Eve© using the slogan “Power to the V” throw me off.

I think it’s sexist at the very least.  Why?  Because not once in my lifetime have I ever seen a man come onto my TV screen, sitting in his favorite recliner or lounging comfortably on the couch, and begin to whisper to the camera in a hushed 2nd Tenor voice that he is having testicular issues.  That he has some itching or odor or chaffing that is noticeable and uncomfortable and that he uses “Chaff-Away” for those “Not-So-Fresh” moments.

Some of these commercials are so absurd that even Saturday Night Live got in on this one, as you can see below for yourself.

And that my lovelies, is what grinds my gears!! LMAO

SNL: Autumn’s Even Pumpkin Spice Douche

 

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New Year… Same Me…

Happy New Year Lovebugs!!

2014 is well underway and as is the ritual and custom the social media stratosphere is abuzz with New Year’s Resolutions… “I’m going to start and/or stop [insert any number of verbs here]” and come February or as late as March, the majority of the resolutions that people have made about who they will become and the things they will or won’t do will be covered with the dust of ages and gathering cobwebs.  I don’t know what it is about the New Year that makes us delude ourselves into thinking that we will be wholly different creature come January 1 then we were on December 31st.  Don’t get me twisted; sometimes we make changes, intensely personal changes that aren’t driven by societal pressures but solely due to a personal revelation and evolution.  But change takes time and effort and a continuous redirection of attentions to achieve it.

As for me, it is a new year and I’m the same me but with a few tweaks here and there.  I can’t change people, the things they say or do or make them into the person I wish they were; nor will I change myself into who will make them comfortable.  I can only change and control how I react.  So this isn’t a New Year’s Resolution, it is simply a promise that I’m making to myself.

I resolve to let go of what others think of me and how I live my life, especially those who mean me absolutely no good… I resolve to continue to surround myself with those who are smarter and more driven then I am, I can learn from them and them from me… I resolve to cultivate those relationships that may have fallen to the wayside… I resolve to me a better me for me and no one else.  I’ve found that as I have made changes to myself over the years, there have been those around me who are uncomfortable with my growth and haven’t accepted it well. It is doubtful that those people are reading this blog post because I had no choice but to leave them where they were and push forward.  But for those who may read this and feel that you fall into the aforementioned category, one of my favorite artists Jill Scott said it best…

Hate on me hater, now or later

‘Cause I’m gonna do me, you’ll be mad, baby

Go ‘head and hate on me, hater, I’m not afraid of

What I got I paid for, you can hate on me

Blessings and Happiness Now & ALWAYS

T. Nicole

 

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I Know You Know You Just Did That!!

Happy New Year my Lovelies and Welcome to 2013!!!

I have seen the mantra, “New Year… New You” for the last couple of weeks and I can tell you that I can’t stand it!!!  How about, “New Year…Same You…Better Decisions”!  I think I need to trademark that… wait… I just did! Whoo Hooo!!!  Speaking of better decisions, I have one that I know we have all had experience with but maybe I am the only one who will put it out on front street. Read the rest of this entry »

 

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What Day Is It?

Ok, I have really got to get back on the ball when it comes to my blog and just about everything else extracurricular in my life. My work and church lives have literally consumed my every waking moment for the last few weeks. Read the rest of this entry »

 

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