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Tag Archives: Social Commentary

The Fallacy and Fairytale of Security in America

19 Nov
The Fallacy and Fairytale of Security in America

No where is safe when you look like me

There’s no safety in our homes, ask Botham Jean and Breonna Taylor 

No safety in our cars, ask Philando Castille

No safety at the corner store;  We’re followed and watched, criminalized based on the hue of our skin

No safety in well-lit places

No safety in broad daylight; ask George Floyd and Ahmaud Arbery

No safety when peacefully protesting

No safety when the cameras are recording; they laugh and yell and taunt

Never any safety in the dark

No safety can even be found within our own skin

When we attempt to create safe spaces we lull ourselves into a false sense of security as those spaces are invaded, violated and stolen right before our eyes

Even in my meditation where there is only me… there is no safety to be found, no matter the attempt at mindfulness.

 
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Posted by on November 19, 2021 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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I See You…

04 Nov
I See You…

Four years ago I pinned a post that spoke to my fear and emotional turmoil over seeing that Apricot Anarchist elected to the highest position in the land. I turned it over and over in my mind how such a thing could really happen and if the ideals that I had been force fed over my lifetime weren’t just a figment of someone’s diseased imagination.

This morning, November 4th, I awoke with hope that decency, love and respect will still prevail as the votes continue to be counted. However… I along side that hope is an anger unlike any that I have vented before. So this is post isn’t for those who voted with me for the Biden/Harris ticket and the Blue Wave. This is for the rest of you, including those of you who didn’t vote at all.

I SEE YOU…

I see you for the hateful, zenophobic racist that you are.  Because to vote for a man that:

  • Lied to the American people about the severity of COVID-19 putting millions at risk
  • Did NOTHING about the spreading pandemic and then even worse, worked against the states themselves to stockpile PPE
  • Is actively working to strip you and more than 20 million Americans of healthcare… during a pandemic
  • Due to his ineptness and narcissism over 200,000 Americans lost their lives to COVID-19 and he was off golfing at his own properties, which my and your tax dollars are having to pay for… speaking of tax dollars…
  • Has only paid $750 in taxes because he says that he’s smarter than you and everyone else who is a chump and pays taxes
  • Was impeached for trying to blackmail and pressure the Ukraine into telling lies against Joe Biden
  • Enacted a Muslim Ban
  • 26 creditable sexual assault accusations
  • Has bankrupted EVERYTHING he has every touched
  • Owes over $400 million dollars to who knows who… shall I continue?

You chose a narcissistic, racist, authoritarian demagogue who rips babies from their parent’s arms and throws them into cages to be abused, neglected and fester in fear as your leader. You voted for a man that forcibly tore children from arms that protected, arms that would have given their very lives to ensure their child(ren)’s safety and you know who couldn’t care less. You voted for a vile racist who’s own parents were in the KKK. You voted for a hateful, lie spewing, divisive man who mocks the differently abled, ignores science, strips protections from the LGBTQIA community, says that someone being an anti-fascist, who believes that Black lives matter are thugs and put the Proud Boys on alert. Shall I continue? Is this your King?

B. Slade put out a lyrical video called “Changes” and it so accurately depicts how so many of us feel in this country. Take a look here https://youtu.be/UqDSxuxGx-g then you will understand the last few paragraphs of this post.

So no, I will not be reaching out a hand and lending a sympathetic ear to “understand” your point of view.  I am quite vehemently done with the whole notion of “well… no matter who wins we have to come together…”.  Hell nah!  Your vote for your own interest is/was a vote against the interest of the rest of us; against the collective body who value and believe in science. Who are decent, hardworking people who think and feel that there is absolutely structural and institutional racism, and we have to put policies and actions in place that provide restorative justice.

I see you!  I see who you are, I see how you really feel about me and my otherness.  I see you and that you would rather vote to keep your power and majority and keep me and mine relegated to a place beneath your feet.  I see for you that Black lives don’t matter, that the extrajudicial murder of Black bodies in the streets is justified and negligible.

Am I mad you ask. Abso-frickin-lutely I am mad!  I am the angry Black woman with poignant words, natural hair and education that you fear.  So, no, don’t talk to me because I will not be engaging you.  I see you for EXACTLY who and what you are.  The beauty of it is that I’m not the only one who sees you…

 
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Posted by on November 4, 2020 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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Running on Fumes

30 Aug
Running on Fumes

I’m tired. Full stop. There’s no ‘but’, ‘however’ or ‘although’ that follows that statement.

I’m tired. The kind of emotional and mental exhaustion that manifests itself physically.

I, like so many Black people, are solely existing and going through life in a fog of anger, despair, and conscious, tempered rage that we have no choice but to push/work through. I’m tired of re-sharing my racial trauma for the white masses to “learn from”.

Why? Why is it my/our responsibility? Why do I have to periodically open up a long festering wound just to show you that it exist? Why do I have to show that which is raw and oozing, forever weeping? As if you seeing the damage inflicted in real time wasn’t proof enough.

Yes, you saw every lash of the racism whip every time you said nothing when a comment was made about my hair/education/experience/tone of voice, etc. You saw the thin veneer of safety ripped away when you knew that cronyism and nepotism were in full working order and you did/said NOTHING. You said nothing because you 100% benefited, either directly or indirectly, from structural racism.

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Posted by on August 30, 2020 in Social Commentary

 

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Don’t Put Your Labels On Me – Part II

21 Oct
Don’t Put Your Labels On Me – Part II

Here we are yet again… *sigh*

I’ve had multiple instances in the past couple of weeks where someone (in this case WASP / White Anglo Saxon Protestant female manager bolstered by another authoritative WASP woman) automatically assumed I was lying and tried to “catch” me by offering up what they saw as “proof”. I had to write detailed explanations of the circumstances, justify myself and provided my own absolutely irrefutable proof that I was indeed being ethical and truthful from the very beginning. (I.e. I shut this mess down quickly with perfect tact, professionalism and screen grabs.) This was followed by the most insulting five words I’ve heard in recent memory, “Thank you for your honesty.”

Thank you for your honesty?! That insinuates that you assume that everything I say and/or do is fabricated until you feel you have sufficient proof that I’m telling the truth. This coming from the same non-POC people who, when the tables are turned, and I KNOW that non-POC has glaringly lied through their perfectly veneered teeth, tell me to “assume positive intent” or that I “misunderstood” what they said/did/asked/instructed/demanded. I am positive that it was intended to make me out a thief of time, a fabricator of salacious falsehoods and unethical to boot. Nothing there to misunderstand.

To compound all of this and add insult to injury, the earlier exchange is later followed by a backhanded compliment of a recorded WebEx presentation I did 3-4 weeks ago saying, “… it was very professional and easy to follow. I was very impressed with your presentation skills…”. There again are the micro aggressions.

It is automatically ASSumed that we are lying. It is automatically ASSumed that, despite our experience and education, we don’t have the same or better skill set than our white counterparts. And when we prove we ARE telling the truth and we DO have the knowledge and expertise, they are “impressed” with our professionalism and presentation skills. You ASSume because of my milk chocolate hued skin, my Afrocentric name and my love of head wraps that I couldn’t possibly be poised and polished and able to lead, teach, and inform the masses, let alone the white masses. I have to prove to you beyond what is expected of my white counterparts that I AM and that I CAN.

This is what it is to be black in Corporate America. This is what it is to be black in America, period.

#staywoke #resist #DiaryOfAMadBlackProfessionalWoman

 
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Posted by on October 21, 2017 in Social Commentary, Work Life

 

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Speak Up! – An Open Letter

18 Mar
Speak Up! – An Open Letter

Update 07/18/17

Since I posted this blog back in March all hell has broken loose

  • Russian interference in our elections, the collusion with Russia by both 45 and 45 Jr. and quite frankly the whole damn lot of 'em
  • Two (2) ACA replacement failures
  • 45 pushing past other world leaders to be in the front for a photograph
  • 45 commenting on President Macron's wife's physical appearance at Bastille Day celebration
  • 45 commenting on an Irish reporter's appearance while on the phone with the Irish Prime Minister
  • 45's hypocritical "Made in America" week when NONE of his products or those of his daughter/personal assistant are made in America
  • covfefe
  • Dozens of other Twitter gaffes

And more today than in March, I and millions of other Americans are resisting and refusing to concede out basic rights.

Come for my birth control and best believe I will leave my kids with you while I work and do everything else I need to do.

Come for my healthcare (I have many pre-existing conditions and chronic illnesses that require constant care and expensive medications) and you will bear the burden of my catastrophic hospital bills (I'm talking hundreds of thousands of dollars) when I'm in ICU because I can't breathe.

If you come for my LGBTQ brothers and sisters I will fight for their right to be whomever they choose to be. I don't care what bathroom someone uses just as long as they clean up after themselves and wash their damn hands. 🏳️‍🌈

Y'all are on notice… don't come for me or mine or attempt to infringe on anyone's rights. I will fight you EVERY 👏🏾 STEP 👏🏾OF 👏🏾THE 👏🏾 WAY👏🏾

Run and tweet that!

An open letter to those who voted for and supported 45:
It's unconscionable that everyone who had a whole hell of a lot to say pre and post election about "Making America Great Again" and that Bernie and Hillary supporters needed to stop whining and get over it are as quiet as sleeping church mice right now. The only sound I hear from that camp are the crickets and blinking peaking out from under blankets, hoping I won't pull back the wool and expose you for who and what you really are. 
There was dissent all over my FB feed. I had to block some people and unfriend others because they, for one reason or another, supported 45. They took what they wanted from what he said (Border security and "bad hombres", repealing the ACA, "putting America first" and all the other slime that poured from his ill-tempered, malicious, hate speech spewing mouth) and ignored EVERYTHING ELSE and had the audacity to say that the other stuff didn't phase them. ("You can just grab them by the pussy", "Nasty woman", "Lock her up"… the list goes on and on and on). The only thing that was important was what mattered to them personally, never giving credence to the millions of others that he offended and harangued. You told us that we should "give him a chance" and our outcries of unfairness and fear where unfounded and that we should stop being butt hurt, get over it and support him. You heckled us as we rallied and protested, called us un-American, unpatriotic and at times said our actions were treasonous. 
Now that you have come to realize what the rest of us knew from the very beginning, you have the unmitigated gall to be silent while the rest of us resist and protest? GTFOH! How dare you! How dare you stay silent and act like none of this was your fault? How dare you creep around and post that you are tired of politics on FB or social media? How dare you do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING and expect those of us who dissented to begin with to fix this? No…no… hell no! 

You lost your right to silence the minute you put up your first post supporting this inept, deluded, mentally unstable demagogue. (Did you cringe or roll your eyes when I used a second word in this post that you might have had to look up? Yeah, you did. That knowledge came from attending PUBLIC school in Houston,TX… something that with Backwards Betty as head of the Department of Education our children will be missing).  

You need to take responsibility for what you have wrought. You need to step up to the mic, clear your throats and say to the rest of us, "My name is <insert your name here> and due to my own <insert adjective here, such as: selfishness/bigotry/racism/misogyny/xenophobia/homophobia/transphobia/general intolerance for anyone who isn't me> I voted for 45. I am woefully sorry and I see the damage he and his minions have done, both to those who live with the borders of this great nation, and to our allies and our reputation on the international stage. I apologize and I stand with you to fix this!"

But you won't do that, will you? No, you won't because you think admitting you were wrong is a show of weakness. You won't because you can't openly admit your prejudices. You'll swear up and down to any god that you are the most tolerant person ever created. When in reality you prefer separate but equal. Minorities and non-Christians are fine as long as they are not in your neighborhood, attending your children's schools or commingling with you and yours. Your silence far from insulates you from what is going on right now. Your silence breeds further contempt from those of us who refuse to be silenced and shows us your yellow badge of cowardice. 

Step up…speak up…
Step up…speak up…

Step up…speak up…

 
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Posted by on March 18, 2017 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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My Seat On The Bus

11 Nov
My Seat On The Bus

In the last 72 hours I have learned so much. I opened up to the general public and let the discourse come in. I welcomed the opportunity to have a respectful, open dialogue with others and to share with them the “why” behind the fear and anger that millions of us feel. However, I have seen the paper thin veneer of decency in this country ripped away to expose the seething and venomous hatred that lies just below the surface.  It isn’t that I didn’t know how oblivious and hateful some people are. It’s about the people who, for whatever reason, still think and contend that the hurt, anger, grief and protest (which is protected by the Constitution whether people agree with what we’re protesting about or not) is simply and ONLY about Hillary not being elected. Frankly that is woefully inaccurate, ignorant and delusional. 

 I wrote in my previous blog post that it is so much deeper than that and I meant it. I put it in the plainest of terms; I shared the terrible, painfully racist, xenophobic and violent encounters that were and continue to be reported and was dismissed as spreading propaganda. Are you serious right now?! I don’t know what kind of fairytale world you have created for yourselves but I live in reality. Not some diseased figment of my imagination where racism, sexism, Islamaphobia, xenophobia and hate don’t exist and where all that give voice to discrimination are silenced and told “that isn’t an issue” or “put it back in the deck”. 

From my seat on the bus it isn’t the millions of upset people in this country who are wrong, it is those who perpetrated this atrocity who are. Here’s the kicker as I ride the bus of discontent and heartache and look out the window at the scenes as I pass by: many of you see absolutely NOTHING wrong with all that Donald Trump has said and done. You dismiss and trivialize the POV of millions and you refuse to believe or repudiate any of the hate speech and violence that is being perpetrated by Trump supporters. Hate speech and violence that he spurred on and approved of during these last 18 months. But now wants us to tow the line and unite and heal the racial divide. It’s so much bigger than a divide, it is a chasm that is deeper and wider than the Grand Canyon. 

 
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Posted by on November 11, 2016 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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America’s Fall From Grace

09 Nov
America’s Fall From Grace

I, like every disenfranchised person of color, LGBT+, woman, handicapped, <insert marginalized group here> in America; like every lover of humanity; like the world, I woke up to what feels like the erosion of my sanity and I heard the metallic clink of slave irons.  I turned off the television before the final call of the election with 4 states still out, and did what I do every night. I prayed. But my prayers were different last night, my heart was racing and I quivered on the inside. It wasn’t from my love and veneration of God , but it was because, for the first time ever in my life, I truly had fear creeping its way around my heart.  Its icy grip piercing into my soul, I saw what the future could be and I curled in around myself, trying to break free.  I’ve seen the ugliest part of humanity these last months, not that I wasn’t glaringly aware of how nasty people can be.

 I was fearful that the bigots, the xenophobes, the homophobes, the sexists, the racists and the demagogues had won. I was fearful that the precious freedoms that I have, like the ability to vote, would be torn from my hands by those who deem me unfit and unworthy. And I cried. I shed tears of frustration, tears of solitude, rivulets of emotions I had surpressed because this couldn’t be possibly happening. This hurt is real, my tears are real, my fear is justifiable. I fear for everyone, every population of people, who were insulted, disrespected, mocked and bullied by Donald Trump and his supporters. I fear for those of us who found out on social media that our “friends” were Trump supporters and closeted bigots, racists, etc. I am genuinely scared that now that Trump has won. I am scared that all of the predators with their racial epithets, slurs and violence will feel absolutely no need to keep hidden anymore. They will feel free and justified in letting it all hang out and that violence against minority groups will ensue, unchecked, as it has with the police force in this country. 

A little more than 50 years ago Blacks couldn’t vote; my mother was born in 1960 and she was born without the right to vote. Slavery didn’t officially end in this country until December 6, 1865, that was only 151 years ago. The memories of Jjm Crow are still fresh in the minds of Black America.  Last night’s election nightmare has proven, without a doubt, that Jim Crow never died. It was festering in the souls of men all this time and finally reared its ugly head and came out of hiding. This hurt and injustice didn’t just happen to our ancestors. This injustice just happened to us. But for all my fear… I have hope. 

I have hope because there will be a resurgence of the Civil Rights movement. A new breed of revolutionaries will take on the mantle of the disenfranchised and we will fight! We will raise up our children to tear down the walls of intolerance and oppression. We will arm them with truth, humility and we will embolden them to challenge anyone who seeks to denigrate others. We are blessed that we still have mentors who fought the good fight and can guide us. This is a rallying cry and we will not be silenced. America, the world, will see that though we grieve at this moment, we don’t grieve as those without hope. 

 
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Posted by on November 9, 2016 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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Why Black Lives, Like All Lives, Matter

01 Sep
Why Black Lives, Like All Lives, Matter

Anyone who knows me well knows that I tend to stay away from politics and religion on social media. It isn’t to say that I don’t have an opinon on global politics, domestic policy or theological discourse; I’m just not one of those people who go back and forth with strangers via Twitter, Facebook or Instagram (no judgement on those who do choose to do so). One person asked me if I was scared to put my thoughts out into the abyss of cyberspace, if I had a fear of people speaking out against me. The short answer is “no”, I have no fear of anyone else’s opinions, I’m strong in my beliefs and have no issue speaking on them when asked. If not wanting to bandy words with those that are militant, racist, facist and/or ignorant is cowardice then you can call me such and I wouldn’t care. 

I say all this as a preface to what comes next. In the last days and months I’ve seen many Facebook posts regarding the Black Lives Matter movement. Today I saw one about a correspondent on Fox News categorizing the entire movement as a ‘hate group’ and ‘murder movement’. And though I’m not surprised by this type of coverage from Fox News, I am surprised at how much hate against the Black Lives Matter movement has been generated. So here’s a combination “Grinds My Gears”/PSA post:

First of all, ALL lives matter.  No one deserves to be beaten, brutalized or murdered. We are all deserving of justice and civility, no matter our socioeconomic status, race or anyone else’s perception of who and what we are.  However, there are those in this vast country that feel and think otherwise. There are those who would deem that Black lives are expendable, disposable and nothing of worth.  This country has seen Blacks ripped from their home countries and shipped across the Middle Passage as chattel. They have been enslaved, raped, beaten, tortured, denigrated, degradated, and had to fight for basic civil rights. From the first day that the first Black person set foot on the soil of this country, they have been deemed less than human and not deserving of the same rights as those who brought them here. Fast forward 150 years after the abolition of slavery, 61 years after the overturning of Plessy vs. Ferguson and 50 years after the enactment of the Voter’s Right Act and still we are called niggers in rants by civil servicemen and lay people alike on Twitter and Facebook. All these years later we as a people are still denegrated and terrorized by those who would and should protect us. 

*As a footnote, I am not speaking of or making a generalization of all peace officers. Just like not all Black males have criminal tendencies and/or backgrounds, not all peace keepers are bigoted, racist or impart injustice on John Q Public. While I absolutely do not condone nor relish in violence against the police, neither do I condone police brutality. Revenge is not an appropriate response to the events of late, it just further widens the gap of racial and social discourse.*

When we consistently and repeatedly see Blacks being accosted and killed just because they are Black, it is no surprise that we have spoken up. When these sad and unnecessary deaths are caught on video and the perpetrators are not held accountable, we speak up. Sadly until you have been accosted, descriminated against, called nigger, black monkey or told “you are so articulate” in a tone that imbides that they are surprised that you have any command of the English language, you’ll never understand why Black lives matter. 

If the power structure was reversed; if history was flip flopped and it was Blacks who enslaved Whites; it was Whites who had to fight and die for the right to vote and send their children to school; if it was Black police officers employing brute force, chokeholds, knees in necks and shooting of unarmed Whites, would you be so critical?  Would you not stand up and say “White Lives Matter”?

  

 
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Posted by on September 1, 2015 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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You Don’t Know What Love Is

03 Mar

Hey my lovelies!!

I’m up late and unable to sleep, which is par for the course with me, but I can’t shut my mind off because of what transpired on Sunday. I went to church yesterday after missing choir rehearsal last week due to both a sinus and upper respiratory infection, and I think my tolerance for people’s bad behavior has reached an all time low. When I come into God’s house I genuinely want to be there. It does my heart good to know that I can be beat up and put down by the world Monday – Saturday, but on Sunday can come to a place where I am embraced and loved.

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Posted by on March 3, 2014 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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A Retardation of Progess

14 Jul

Happy Sunday my Lovelies!

My heart is heavy today as are many, many others. We all know of the travesty and miscarriage of justice that occurred on last night and for the sake of my poor eyes, swollen from crying, I won’t rehash every horrible detail or the trial in its entirety. But it is time that I say those things and put into words the sentiment that I know is shared among us all.

What has happened in the last few weeks has negated all the years of moving forward that we thought we had made. The Supreme Court struck down the most important parts of the Voting Rights Act of 1965, asserting that our country has come so far that racism is no longer an issue, especially in the South. Lies and untruths! Racism is still as active and alive as it was during Jim Crow, it just isn’t as overt as it used to be. Those bigots that discriminated against and mistreated minorities during Jim Crow had children and some of them unfortunately were raised with and embraced the hateful rhetoric of their parents. They in turn had children and the cycle continues unabated. Not everyone raised under this oppressive and bigoted environment accepted this hateful stance on others as the gospel and forged knowledge of their own.

Nonetheless, I can attest that even at my young age I have been discriminated against,. I’ve been called a nigger to my face during my freshman year of college at a well-known and respected university in College Station, TX. I’ve been pulled over at night driving through the back streets to my house just because I’m Black in a non-minority-based neighborhood. I’ve been in a store in a predominantly white neighborhood and had someone assume that I worked there rather than being there to shop like them.

*So it went that a woman came up to me and said, “Can you get me this (pushing a blouse at me) in a bigger size?” I nicely and promptly informed her that I didn’t work at the store and she blinked at me in disbelief with her face turned up and stammered, “Oh… I just assumed…”. I said nothing, smiled, and walked away. In my car, I just sat contemplating the fact that there are still those who believe that someone who looks like me should be automatically assumed to be “the help” and in a position of servitude. *

It wasn’t so long ago that James Byrd, Jr. Was dragged to death in Jasper, TX by a group of white supremacists. Treyvon Martin was targeted and murdered simply for being young, Black, and in a predominantly white neighborhood. Nine (9) southern states can change their voting laws, including the ability to enact voter ID requirements, without being subject to federal oversight. We have retarded our progress forward and toward equality. I am fearful not only for our youth, and our children but also us as adults. It is a liability to be who and what God created me to be. Meditate on that.

 
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Posted by on July 14, 2013 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary

 

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