Here we are yet again… *sigh*
I’ve had multiple instances in the past couple of weeks where someone (in this case WASP / White Anglo Saxon Protestant female manager bolstered by another authoritative WASP woman) automatically assumed I was lying and tried to “catch” me by offering up what they saw as “proof”. I had to write detailed explanations of the circumstances, justify myself and provided my own absolutely irrefutable proof that I was indeed being ethical and truthful from the very beginning. (I.e. I shut this mess down quickly with perfect tact, professionalism and screen grabs.) This was followed by the most insulting five words I’ve heard in recent memory, “Thank you for your honesty.”
Thank you for your honesty?! That insinuates that you assume that everything I say and/or do is fabricated until you feel you have sufficient proof that I’m telling the truth. This coming from the same non-POC people who, when the tables are turned, and I KNOW that non-POC has glaringly lied through their perfectly veneered teeth, tell me to “assume positive intent” or that I “misunderstood” what they said/did/asked/instructed/demanded. I am positive that it was intended to make me out a thief of time, a fabricator of salacious falsehoods and unethical to boot. Nothing there to misunderstand.
To compound all of this and add insult to injury, the earlier exchange is later followed by a backhanded compliment of a recorded WebEx presentation I did 3-4 weeks ago saying, “… it was very professional and easy to follow. I was very impressed with your presentation skills…”. There again are the micro aggressions.
It is automatically ASSumed that we are lying. It is automatically ASSumed that, despite our experience and education, we don’t have the same or better skill set than our white counterparts. And when we prove we ARE telling the truth and we DO have the knowledge and expertise, they are “impressed” with our professionalism and presentation skills. You ASSume because of my milk chocolate hued skin, my Afrocentric name and my love of head wraps that I couldn’t possibly be poised and polished and able to lead, teach, and inform the masses, let alone the white masses. I have to prove to you beyond what is expected of my white counterparts that I AM and that I CAN.
This is what it is to be black in Corporate America. This is what it is to be black in America, period.
#staywoke #resist #DiaryOfAMadBlackProfessionalWoman
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T. Nicole's Graham Cracker Crumbs 
The Fallacy and Fairytale of Security in America
No where is safe when you look like me
There’s no safety in our homes, ask Botham Jean and Breonna Taylor
No safety in our cars, ask Philando Castille
No safety at the corner store; We’re followed and watched, criminalized based on the hue of our skin
No safety in well-lit places
No safety in broad daylight; ask George Floyd and Ahmaud Arbery
No safety when peacefully protesting
No safety when the cameras are recording; they laugh and yell and taunt
Never any safety in the dark
No safety can even be found within our own skin
When we attempt to create safe spaces we lull ourselves into a false sense of security as those spaces are invaded, violated and stolen right before our eyes
Even in my meditation where there is only me… there is no safety to be found, no matter the attempt at mindfulness.
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Posted by grahamcrackercrumbs09 on November 19, 2021 in Grinds My Gears, Social Commentary
Tags: Black Lives, Black Lives Matter, Life, racism, Random Thoughts, Reflections, Social, Social Commentary, Social Justice